dominance

Very often there is a partner in a sexual role that wants to be dominate.

Female/male intimacy. It is always great when the female
takes the lead but I feel in f/m sex, it is one of the two who take the
lead and usually it is the male. Their lead is not necessarily considered
dominance however the possibility is there. Perhaps it is a male thing
to take the lead as a show of manliness.

In male/male sexual roles there are males that are truly dominate,
and function in this role which they desire and expect from their partner.

The question I have is there something that has occurred for
one to be dominate in sexual roles? Where there triggers from their youth?
I feel there had to be something for someone to get there
satisfaction over dominating another. It would be interesting
to hear from those that take a dominate roll in sex.

This topic was edited
RE:dominance

Very often there is a partner in a sexual role that wants to be dominate.Female/male intimacy. It is always great when the femaletakes the lead but I feel in f/m sex, it is one of the two who take thelead and usually it is the male. Their lead is not necessarily considereddominance however the possibility is there. Perhaps it is a male thingto take the lead as a show of manliness.In male/male sexual roles there are males that are truly dominate,and function in this role which they desire and expect from their partner.The question I have is there something that has occurred forone to be dominate in sexual roles? Where there triggers from their youth?I feel there had to be something for someone to get theresatisfaction over dominating another. It would be interestingto hear from those that take a dominate roll in sex.

There's a ton of layers here and the best thing to do is get a couple books on leather sex and BDSM and see how it is articulated. First major thing is for most styles and rules the roles are not real. It has nothing to do with the actual or lack of "dominance" but rather the preference for one role or another in that situation. As you point out the way we choose is based in cultural values. Men over women is the traditional way of seeing power relationships BUT in MF BDSM overwhelmingly the F is the Dom. Lead is not the same as Dom. Top is not the same as Dom or lead. A top or a dom may tell a sub or bottom to lead. There are the so called power bottoms which is fine by me but not understanding what it's truly about but ok I don't have to. Generally it follows in hetero BDSM that the more powerful the person is in life the more likely they are a sub. Generally you don't want to do work at play. For some men especially their identity is deeply implicated in Dom or Top roles. I have rarely seen any

This post was edited