Advice in avoiding new mistakes?

Hi all! My husband and I are wanting to enter the wonderful world of swinging/cuckolding. It's been a fantasy of his for a long time and has gotten me into the idea.

For the past year or so we've role played and had lengthy conversations about expectations. He wants to watch but will join if I want him to. We joined a site and actually met one guy. I vetoed taking him home because I didn't feel any sexual chemistry with him. My husband says I just got cold feet. Is it common for the woman to meet several guys until one she likes comes along? The guy was attractive so maybe it was nerves.

We've never done anything like this so any advice to avoiding rookie mistakes is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

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RE: Advice in avoiding new mistakes?

hello! :)iread with interest your comment ... I can onlyadvise you to free your mind from all worries about what you'redoing and who you're doing it.... you just think you're doingsomething enjoyable and that what you're doing can give youtremendous physical pleasure....You must try to fulfill only yourmost intimate fantasies ... that should be your onlythought........also,i can recommend, for my experience, toyou having sex without worrying about safesex and protections. Youlet your feelings flow freely, you have to enjoy the direct contactskin to skin with your new sex partner....the real secret to a newbie in this world, is letting go to the feelings and not worry about other than enjoy as much as possible....

Thank you for telling them exactly what not to do!

Safe sex should be mandatory in any new contact, even if it is your new bf/gf. Better safe than sorry and you can't get rid of HIV once you have been infected.


As to the the woman being sort of "accused" of having had cold feet I would say listen to that inner feeling. A plastic fantastic person which doesn't arouse you will rarely lead to a nice sexual experience. Instead you might get a feeling of being (ab)used and where is the fun then?

Sure, some people like to get used and some even abused (Eurythmics nailed that one) but even then chemistry and a feeling of arousal is definitely needed.

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