What do you think?
I am confused. I ache to cum, I have done mutual oral before with no guilt or anxiety. I have been without any release due largely to this COVID. But I just had a guy invite me over for some fun and chickened out I always get vey nervous and unless am fortified with several beers I never go through with it. Why am I only bi when buzzed?
Probably due to the idea that there must be something wrong if you enjoy sex with men. I had a heart condition that they were able to fix with surgery. Once I recovered I realized that life is too short to worry about who gives you a hand or mouth. The issue with Covid is to not take chances. So if you have a play buddy that you would be best.
I have been looking for a while also. Wife and I use to love to go to King Spa before Covid hit. Love the fact that in the male locker room wet area you have to be naked. Loved seeing all those cocks. And at times in the steam room was able to play with cocks.
I am confused. I ache to cum, I have done mutual oral before with no guilt or anxiety. I have been without any release due largely to this COVID. But I just had a guy invite me over for some fun and chickened out I always get vey nervous and unless am fortified with several beers I never go through with it. Why am I only bi when buzzed?
You struggle with how much you want it, and rather than deal with it (I was this way for years, it's not a judgment, but just how we are after being conditioned against male male sex and intimacy) head on, you use a bit of a depressant to lower your own judgement but in this case, of yourself primarily, the nerves are part of being excited afraid vulnerable and new to it, worried that the outcome will be either being treated badly or being too into it (by a arbitrary standard),
I bet if you hung out nude with a confident handsome guy who was very respectful of boundaries and you got to be relaxed and enjoy his company, it would happen one day and that would be that, I think also sex without intimacy or friendship in this isolated climate is not as attractive because you and I and we all know it doesn't replace what's missing which is necessary if you are human and affection and touch are not sexual or gendered just the basic healing mechanism we have for our emotional well being.
I am confused. I ache to cum, I have done mutual oral before with no guilt or anxiety. I have been without any release due largely to this COVID. But I just had a guy invite me over for some fun and chickened out I always get very nervous and unless am fortified with several beers I never go through with it. Why am I only bi when buzzed?
If you are nervous due to COVID, there are other creative ways to play safe e.g. a portable glory hole creates the physical barrier necessary to avoid breathing the same air. Drinking only impairs your judgment so you could also not drink and not get nervous.
I'd like to know this as well, I have a guy that for the last 2 years has done a similar thing, he always gets dutch courage when he's drunk, then he goes missing in action, I don't get it. I'm a nice guy, I don't force myself upon anyone so what is he afraid of. We did actually manage to meet once and he was definitely into it, not much happened as he didn't have lube or poppers and as this was going to be his first time being penetrated I didn't want to proceed without him being properly prepared and to also have a good experience. So who knows if the opportunity will present itself again.
But in answer to your question only you know why you chicken out, there must be something you're afraid of facing or is it that you feel you'll have to label yourself if you admit to wanting to play with a guy?
hopefully you'll figure it out and will end up enjoying yourself, it really isn't all that scary for any of you who are in the same boat.
You know yourself best, I find that some guys can get things stuck in their head and then spin out over it and really over think it. Meeting up with another person does not mean you have to do something you do not want to do. You do have agency, this idea that a man has invited you over, even with the intent for some potential sex does not require you to engage in anything you do not wish to do. You are just going to hang out and see how the energy goes. You can even say that to the host that you just wanted to meet up and see how things go. So that should calm down your mind a bit. This goes for any situation, including so called sex dates. No one is obligated to have sex if they are not feeling the interest or desire as you can always change your mind.
I am confused. I ache to cum, I have done mutual oral before with no guilt or anxiety. I have been without any release due largely to this COVID. But I just had a guy invite me over for some fun and chickened out I always get vey nervous and unless am fortified with several beers I never go through with it. Why am I only bi when buzzed?[/q
Fear, anxiety, shame, desire, memory, training, habit. The fight or flight response is basically the underlying mechanism. Military training around self control and regimented execution of tasks, command chain and a lifetime of perfecting that mode of living gets in the way of this interest for lots of reasons and I wasn't ever in service but, all my scout leaders were active or retired officers and we were trained along very similar lines as appropriate for the age group. I had to get drunk too once I got out iin the world. One, I didnt want to lbe in control of the decisions, I didnt want to be afraid or chicken out, I didnt think anyone would be intterested and I was so uptight over it all that I couldnt do it otherwise. Here's my advice. Find someone wjho understnands that nervousness. who will make a deal with you to work on that before anything else. And who will be open to returning to share again, if you both enjoy it, that is. Stop putting the burden of what you want on who you are or are not. Regimentalize it a bit. Give yourself no alteratives but to follow through after a certain grace period. FIgure out what the root reasons for your reaction and work on letting go of some stuff and emrbacing what you want to experience.
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